My New Commitment

I am starting tomorrow to do my lifestyle change. I'm not calling it a diet because I know that it doesn't feel that way. When I did this three or 4 years ago I dropped 80 lbs in a year and felt FANTASTIC! I've since put half of that weight back on. I've been promising myself for almost six months to get back on track and now is the time. No whining, no complaining, no excuses about being too busy, or too tired, or too anything.

I got this eating plan from the Diabetic Management Center from Butler Hospitals, if anyone would like to check this eating plan out, let me know and I'll see if I can get you a copy.

I got a pre-diabetes diagnosis in 2007 and after much fear, tears, and wondering what my future would hold, I decided that diabetes wasn't going to win. It wasn't going to beat me and I would win! So I buckled down and became a food nazi for myself. I wasn't the kind of crazy,food obsessive, freak who would berate other people for eating bad things, I just knew I couldn't do it anymore. I knew that I needed to be as strict as possible for my own health and well being.

Before I even met with a CDE I had gone on the internet and tried to educate myself as much as possible about "my condition" I went to the diabetic education classes well armed with knowledge and a few questions. It was there I got this diet and an idea of how I was going to have to really change my life.

So, I checked my blood sugars, ate well, made sure I got in a bit of exercise and by the end of a year I was 80 lbs thinner, with a much higher exercise rate (which isn't surprising since I was a couch potato)

Jump to 2009, a very long year of dealing with my ailing mother in law and her final days of stage 4 lung cancer in early November and I was lost. We then found out in December that we were expecting. A thrilling surprise, but scary with my diabetes diagnosis two years before. I was now a high risk pregnancy. I was put on insulin, and had to be even more strict with my eating plans and exercise.

Unfortunately after the birth of my son, I stupidly decided I deserved a break from it all. After being so incredibly controlled and well monitored, I took a flying swan dive right off the wagon and landed with a big face plant.

I've now put on 40lbs of the 80 I lost (perhaps slightly less...but I'm counting it a straight 40) and I feel ick. Not as bad as before mind you, just out of control and incredibly silly and dumb for allowing myself to be so incredibly irresponsible. My sugars aren't great, they're not BAD, but not where I'd like them to be. I worry I'll be needing meds if I don't soon start correcting myself. I'm sure meds are in my future at some point, but I'd like to keep them at bay for as long as humanly possible! I have done the whole joyous insulin game, and I'd like to avoid that even more than meds.

So there you have it, that's where I stand in my current journey. I am putting my foot down and deciding once again that I'm going to be the victor in this battle! From here onward, my goal is to lose this 40 I've put on, and then add to that loss total. I want to be healthy and be around a long time for my son! I want to be able to play in the backyard and not feel like a lopping elephant with a heart made of lead.